Wednesday, March 22, 2006

not gonna make my goal

Hi all. I'm not going to make my 40 mile goal this week. Not my fault though. Blame it on the 4 inches of rain we got Monday night. Actually, it wasn't the rain, it was the lightning. Normally I run in the rain but I try not to die from electricity. SOooo . . . . the fatman ran on the treadmill WHICH I HATE! Since it just didn't feel right, I jumped on my trainer and pedaled for 30 minutes and then worked out. However, I do not count treadmill mileage. It just doesn't seem right to count it if you're watching Seinfeld as the same time.

Tonight I was supposed to run 8 1/2 miles. I think I did 7 1/2. I lost track due to Marc (animal) . . . we turned left instead of going and straight and then we ran a hard loop . . . . I guess I lost oxygen to the brain. Anyway, it was 7 1/2 miles in 61 1/2 minutes which still works out to an 8:12 average. Pretty happy with it.

I'm heading to Vidalia, GA in the morning (flying down for a day trip) and will be home in time to run Thursday night. I am planning on hills or yasso 800s. It depends on how I feel. I may even fall back and do fartleks if I'm too sore.

Sunday, March 19, 2006

another 18 miler

Good Sunday afternoon. I've been in the garage cleaning out JUNK! Getting ready for a yard sale in a couple of weeks. It absolutely amazes me how one man's junk is another man's treasure. Very similar to the Conservation of Matter law if you remember your physics. "Matter is neither created nor destroyed. I can only change states." Junk-treasure, treasure-junk. oh well, so much for my science humor.

I did my 18 miler yesterday morning. I was in the low 40s with a fairly brisk wind so it fel pretty cold most of the run. I did as I promised myself. I ran the first 14 miles or so right at a 9:00/mile pace. I felt slow but it allowed me to run the last four miles at a quicker pace and I actually had something left in the tank. I probably could have pushed it to a 20 miler but decided not to do so. I'll save the 20 miler for next weekend!

I hope you had a great week. This coming week may be tough around here. It is supposed to be cold and rainy most of the week. Here's the plan:

Monday-8 1/2 miles at a 10k pace
Wednesday- 6 miles at marathon pace
Thursday-Either hill repeats or Yasso 800s
Saturday-20 miles

This should give me in excess of 40 miles for the week. Usually if I start getting into the mid 40s, I tend to start having injuries, so I'll have to keep an eye on it!

Thursday, March 16, 2006

A better week

Okay . .
I'm pulling out of the funk-as expected. According to the experts, my life will be a roller coaster for a while, but it will eventually smooth out. Thank you for all the comforting words from friend and family. You cards, posts, and emails are more helpful than you'd ever know!

That being said, this is all about running (and biking)! Wed night I had a pretty nice run. Bizarre, but nice. My intention was to run a SLOW, EASY 6 miler. I need to start tuning my body to feel a 9 minute pace for my planned 4 hour marathon. I have been running my long runs too fast and my weekly runs even faster. I decided to run a 9:00 minute pace for my 6 miler. Couldn't do it. My first 3 miles were more along the lines of an 8 minute pace. I finally just slammed on the brakes and ran the last 3 miles at slightly under a 9 minute pace. 6 miles in a little under 51 minutes. I know that is not fast for some of you out there. The 9 minute pace felt SO SLOW. In fact, I think it made me more tired than running the faster pace. I felt like I was not as effecient . . . felt like I was bouncing more than striding. That being said, I am planning on doing my 18 miler this Saturday at a SLOWER PACE!

Tonight I did hill work. 2 1/2 miles to warm up.
5 x 0.2 mile hill repeats
1 1/2 mile cool down.

Felt great! Worked out afterwards.

BTW . . . I am trying out a pair of new Mizuno Renegade 2 shoes. They seem to be doing okay and feel pretty good. The heel cup is a little shallower than I am used to, but it isn't affecting my running. I still want to figure out the problem with the Beasts . . . . I may try one more time with a 12EE.

I'm taking off tomorrow and will do 18 miles on Saturday (without fagging out). Chip is doing the Germantown, TN half marathon and his wife Dori is doing the 5K. Good luck to you guys!

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

A better week

Sorry about the bummer post the other night. Sometime writing about stuff empowers us to control it. At least I think it helps.

Monday afternoon run definitely helped shake some of the garbage out. I did a 7.2 miler and continuously picked up the pace. This was a nice, hard run but I still felt in control and never felt like I was racing. Animal (Marc) ran the last couple of loops with my and helped me push the pace a little bit. Thanks Marc!

As some of you may know I normally do a 1.2 mile loop and here's my loops and equavilent paces:

10:14 loop is 8:33 pace
10:09 loop is 8:27 pace
10:00 loop is 8:20 pace
9:54 loop is 8:15 pace
9:29 loop is 7:55 pace
9:14 loop is 7:42 pace

Avg loop is 9:50 which is 8:12 average

After the run I lifted weights and did pretty good there as well.

Maybe I'm back to normal or at least as close to normal as possible.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Funky weekend

Hi all . . .
It looks like I am going to make it through another weekend. It started off Friday night pretty good but went down hill from there. I went to a friend's house for dinner and it just sort of struck me how much of a 5th wheel I am. As much as they want to help me, I just feel that I don't fit in.

I got up Saturday morning to do my 18 miler. You guessed it . . . I fagged out at 16 miles. Between it being 70 degrees and humid and the Friday night funk, I just didn't have it in me. Chip ran 13 miles with me and we ran about a 8:40-8:45 pace. I pretty much ran this same pace for whole 16 miles. I guess I should be happy that I was able to do that much considering the conditions. Regardless, I am very task and goal oriented and my failure to make me goal put me into more of a funk.

On the up side, I picked up my new bike and it fits like a dream. All Ultegra components and the rear derailer is Dura-Ace! This thing is smooth! Can't wait to get it out on the road.

I'm back home after meeting with my church family group (small group). They try to help but sometimes there is no help. Some things just have to be dealt with. Of course, I've been warned that I'll have "spells" like this. It just hurts. I can't put my finger on anything specific. I just hate this hole that is inside me. I know . . . this is a bummer blog tonight. Sorry.

Friday, March 10, 2006


Run Jim, Run! Posted by Picasa

Friday . . . at last!

Friday afternoon and I'm gettting ready to go to a friend's house for dinner and cards . . . No, not poker! Canasta. Nobody ever said I was exciting.

Let me catch you up . . . Wed night I did a 7 1/2 miler at an 8:36 pace. Felt pretty good. I'm still in the maddening search for new shoes. My old Beasts have close to 500 miles on them and I can tell it. I bought a pair of Saucony Grid Stabils just to have something to run in. I've always loved the fit and feel of Saucony but they just don't last. I have less than 250 miles on them and the soles are shot. I'm trying a pair of NB1010 until I can figure out how the new Beasts fit me. I may just have to stick to the Saucony until my marathon is over. At least I know they fit and they feel good though I can tell they're not as stable as the "fatboy" shoes from Brooks and New Balance.

Thursday night I did hills. Warmed up with 3 miles and did 5 x 0.2 mile repeats and then cooled off with a mile run.

This week has been pretty hectic. I've been in training at work all week and had an exam today. Thermodynamics and steam properties . . . . ACED the test! Next week is fluids and heat transfer-I can't wait . . . . yeah, right!

I'm planning an 18 miler Saturday morning and then I'm going to visit my parent and have THE BIG BREAKFAST. If you've never had THE BIG BREAKFAST at my parents house, you have missed one of the 10 greatest wonders in the universe. You don't have to eat for 3 days . . . sort of like a bear getting ready for hibernation. Eggs, bacon, ham, sausage, hash browns, grits, HOMEMADE biscuits, gravy. Enough to feed a small country.

so the plan is to drop about 3 pounds during the run and put it back on during breakfast. Doesn't that sound like a FATBOY???

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Getting back to life

A note for Cary . . . . the fat man has been trying to catch me the last couple of weeks. I let him sneak up on me by a couple of pounds so I am hitting my Weight Watchers hot and heavy again. I got back into sloppy eating habits and cut back a little bit on my running and WHAMO! The fat man was grabbing at my shirt tail.

I ran last night. A pretty good 6 miler. Was going to be an easy recovery run but the weather was so nice I started picking up the pace. I ended up running it in 49:18 (8:13 pace) which is decent for me . . . especially with the couple of extra pounds I picked up since the Mercedes. I also got back to working out seriously. I have determined that my life needs DISCIPLINE and STRUCTURE. The best way I can provide these things to myself is through my exercise (and getting rid of the girlscout cookies I bought!).

One more thing that I HAVE to get off my chest- Brooks has really screwed up my shoe . . . The Beast. They changed the model for "improvements" such as a better midsole, etc. According to Brooks, it is the same shoe, same last, same fit. I have to throw the B.S. flag on that last statement. I was originally in 11 1/2 D Beasts. I have tried 11 1/2 D, 12 D, 12 1/2 D, 12 1/2 2E. I just can't get the right fit!!! It seems they've narrowed up the midfoot area and increased the toebox. BIG BUMMER. I love the old shoe but this one just ain't right. I guess I'll have to go back to NB or Saucony.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Catching up again!

Okay . . . I've caught enough grief that I am updating tonight.

Let's see how this week went. I ran a six miler Thursday afternoon after I got back in town from Vidalia.

I ran a 15 miler Saturday morning. Averaged 8:39 pace. Held a very good pace . . . it didn't vary by more than 10 seconds per the entire run. I was sort of surprised considering that I have been slacking a little bit the last couple of weeks. It hit me today that I REALLY need to bear down the next 9 or 10 weeks. It is getting down to crunch time and I need to get on the stick if I'm gonna break my four hour marathon.

I ran Saturday morning with Chip. He did a 17 miler, but we ran together pretty weill. May be the reason why I was able to hold such a good pace. Of course Chip's goal is to qualify for Boston (3:30). Thanks Chip!

After I ran Saturday morning, I went out and ordered my new bike. Yep, I did it!
A Specialized Roubaix Expert Double with compact chain ring. Not gonna talk about how much money I spent. I better like bike riding!

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

trying to catch up

Hey all,
I've been bad. I have not been updating the last few days. Of course, I am working 12 hour days which means (after the roadwork) I only have about 10 hours a day. Sounds like a lot but after 7-8 hours of sleep, it is not much. I am going home on Thursday morning. I am ready for a break.

I ran a 10 miler last Saturday. It was supposed to be a 15 miler prepping for the flying pig marathon but I dogged it off after 10. It was raining and after working several 12 hour days, I just wasn't up for it.

I did run a 6 miler on Monday night. Nothing fast. After a day full of work in safety boots and climbing around, it was about all I wanted to do. Just ran and no dinner. Went to bed after shower.

I am planning on running a 6 to 8 miler when I get home on Thursday afternoon and doing my 15 miler this coming Saturday morning. I need to do 18 or more, but I have an event Saturday night and don't need to be totally wiped out. It is a big dress up gala and I am actually taking a companion. Not a date. She's a daughter of a friend of mine. I know . . . I'm old enough to be her father! I have no plans of anything other than having a nice dinner, enjoying the silent auction, and maybe some dancing.

I'll update after my run tomorrow.

Friday, February 24, 2006

Out of town training

Hey all. I am in Vidalia, GA, working on a shutdown. I traveled EARLY Wed. morning (up at 4:00 am and on the road long before 5:00) going directly to the plant and worked until about 6:30 pm that night. By the time I got checked into the hotel I really didn't feel like going for a run so I bagged it and just went to dinner. It is tough to keep a schedule when you're working 6-6 and you don't really get "home" until 7:00. Especially knowing that you're rolling out of the rack at 4:30 every morning.

I did make myself run Thursday night after I got back to the hotel. I started my run at 7:00 and it was totally in the dark so I wore my Petzl headlamp and little fancy red flashing light on my back so I wouldn't get run over by the locals as they fly up and down the road to Wal-Mart. Overall I was pleased with my run. I ran 6 miles and averaged 8:20 miles. Not too bad considering it was dark, I kept jumping off the road due to traffic, and I had been climbing around all day in safety boots. By the time I finished and showered it was about 8:15 . . . too late for supper since I've been hitting the rack around 9:30. Of course skipping a meal or two doesn't hurt me :)

I'm glad this is only for a week or so. I am not crazy about not having much me time. It would be too easy to get discouraged and get into sloppy habits. I must keep the FATMAN at bay!

Monday, February 20, 2006

Starting back up . . flying pig or bust

It's been a couple of days since I've posted. Sorry about that. I did not get to run in Tupelo as I had planned. The weather did get nasty on us. Rain and 33 degrees. Just waiting to turn to ice. In fact, there was some freezing rain that was falling. It just wasn't sticking.

Sooooooo . . .
I did my 12 miler Sunday afternoon. It was in the high 30s with a very light breeze and broken clouds. It wouldn't have hurt my feelings if it had been a little bit warmer but I survived. Total run was 1 hour, 42 minute, 37 seconds. If my math is correct that works out to 8:33 pace. Felt pretty good. Marc "Animal" ran about 5 or 6 miles with me before he took off for some hill work-thanks Marc. I can always count on him to make me run just a little bit faster.

I've got to start bearing down to get ready for the Flying Pig marathon. I only have 11 weeks left and I still need to get in at least 2 20 milers and I want to do a 24 miler also. If you space some 15 and 18 milers in between you can see I don't have a whole lot of slop in my training schedule.

Friday, February 17, 2006

Recovering

Hey all!
I am recovering from the effects of THE BUG I had last week and the 1/2 marathon I ran on Sunday. It seems that THE BUG hit our street last week with a flurry. Best we can tell it started at one of the little girl's birthday party two Saturdays ago and spread from there. Some of the mothers called it rotavirus . . . we just called it THE BUG.

Anyway . . . I've gotten over the race from last Sunday and the trotskys. Not a good thing to have going on at the same time.

I did not run Monday or Tuesday. Legs were a little sore. I did run a reasonably brisk (8:15 pace) 6 miler Wednesday night and did Hill work on Thursday night. The hill work did take a little out of as my legs and hips were still a little sore. However, I sucked it up and got the workout done.

I'm going to spend the night in Tupelo tonight. It is Mona's mom's birthday and I think she's been having a harder time with Mona's passing than I have. I figured I'd go and try to keep her mind off it. Also while in Tupelo, Shane (running in the deep south blog) and I are planning on meeting up for a run. I'm hoping to get in 10-12 easy miles. However, they (weather goobers) are predicting winter storm conditions so I'll just have to see how the weather is and if Shane is a fair weather runner or a hard core, do it unless it's lightning, kind of guy. We may be running in an ice storm! Of course if it looks too bad, I may bail just to make sure I can leave early enough to get back to B'ham.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Did okay but . . .

I ran my race. No, actually I ran everyone else's race. Why do slow people insist on getting near the starting line? I'm sorry . . . I am not fast but I can run an 8 minute pace. Why do 12 minute milers want to get that close to the front? PLEASE explain!!!

I tried to get into the pen area where the 8 minute pacers were supposed to be. FULL. I moved back, and back, and back. I wish the race officials would actually seed people and place them accordingly. Can you tell that I am slightly perturbed? My first mile was 10 1/2 minutes. Most of the time was spent passing and weaving through walkers and slower runners. Don't get me wrong. I am not a race snob. I have no reason to be. But I know better than to line up with the 5 minute milers. I will line up with the 8 minute milers. Why must a 300 lb walker (nothing wrong with that) line up in the 7 minute per mile chute?

Anyway . . . after a 10 1/2 minute mile, my second mile sped up to a blazing 9:15 pace. 2 miles into the race I am 2 minutes and 15 seconds in the hole. I never really did hit my pace until after mile 3. Mile 5-6 was all uphill so that was a slow mile. Mile 9-10 was all uphill. Being sick caught up with me after mile 10. Let's just say I had the trots with the trots! Lost another minute in the port-o-let at mile 11.

Bottom line is I did not break the 1:50 I wanted. Clock time was 1:55 and change. I have not checked my chip time but I think it is somewhere around 1:53. Not to make excuses-it was in the high 20s with 20-25 mph wind gusts out of the NW. The windchill during the race was high teens/low 20s. Not exactly ideal conditions.

Here I am around mile 7. I was making up time and feeling good at this point. I'm the guy on the right!



Overall, I am happy with my run. I just wish a couple of things had gone better. You live and learn. Next time I'll get into the chutes an hour early to make sure I have a half decent start.

Saturday, February 11, 2006

The night before

Okay. Tonight is the night before Mercedes Marathon here in Birmingham, AL. As followers of my blog, you know that I am running the half marathon tomorrow morning. I am hoping to break 1:50 but we'll see. I have been sick all week and trying to recover. I felt decent Friday and pretty good today. I went down to the race expo and saw several people I know. It is always good to be around a bunch of runners . . . you draw a lot of energy for a crowd like that. Are you fortunate to know what I am talking about? I hope you're fortunate enough to be able to enjoy what I'm talking about.

I know the course since it is my home course. I've studied the elevation changes and know where I can make up time and where I will lose time. I've got my plan. Let's hope I can carry through with it. I think I've recovered from being sick. I skipped my Friday run just to make sure I didn't stress my body. I know it sounds stupid and paranoid but that's the way I'm wired.

I've enjoyed a nice pasta supper, a couple of glasses of vino to relax and I'm sitting here watching The Green Mile on network TV. I know the vino is not a good thing to do before the race but I've drank wo much water today that I've been going potty every 15 minutes. That's a pretty good sign that I am adequately hydrated.

Wish me luck and I'll post either the good news or the bad news tomorrow!

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Just a few more days

Just a few more days until I make my assault on my half-marathon PR. This is becomming a challenge. Over the last month I had no doubt about breaking 1:50 in the half. After getting sick this past Sunday night, I am now wondering if I've got the hoo-haws to do it. I ran 6 miler Wednesday night since I had started feeling better. BIG mistake. It probably set me back another day in my recovery. I am supposed to run 6 miles Friday night but I think I will skip it. I had rather give my body time to heal than to stress it and make things worse.

I went to the Dr today just to see what this ailment I have is named. I call it a pain in the bottom. After doing bloodwork, he told me my white count was down. Probably indicating some kind of viral activity. Just a stomach bug. Not much to do except let it run it's course, drink plenty of fluids. He did recommend that I take Potassium and Magnesium to try to build up electolytes. My Dr. is a biker and understands my desire to complete my goal. Of course, as he warned, I need to listen to my body and if body says "no", then I need to listen. However, right now my body says cool it until Sunday morning and then go do it. If I don't post by late Sunday night, you'll know that I either ran off to Jamaica or I'm hospitalized for not listening to my body!

I'm still shopping for a bike. I'm really considering the Specialized Roubaix. I'll make a decision later. I'm not real crazy about test riding right now considering what my body has been doing to itself and fact that it is just dang cold. Speaking of cold, it is supposed to be one our coldest mornings the morning of the Mercedes marathon. They keep pushing the forecast temperature down. I think it supposed to be low 20s. I know that is not cold for some of you. Normally it is not cold for me. However, January was temperature was in the 40s, 50s, and even in the 60s. I'm not sure if I'll be wearing tights, but I will be wearing long sleeves and gloves.

BTW, Amy did her 10 miler. Sounds like she had fun and the endorphins kicked in for her. Be sure to go to her site, read her story and congratulate her. Also, Shane did an 8 miler at a very good pace. He's targeting a 5k in 8 weeks. Be sure to lend him your support.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Absolute PANIC!

I cannot believe it. I had to leave work today because I got SICK! Why does this always seem to happen to me right when I get into shape? I had to skip my run tonight and my weight lifting. I've been backtracking in my mind over the last couple of days about who I have been in touch with. I don't remember being around anyone sick. I was around some kids at church (nasty little Petri dishes that breed germs and bacteria).

I'm hoping that it is just a stomach thing. I, like most people watching the super bowl last night, enjoyed several appetizers, soup, snacks. I didn't over eat and I did not over indulge. I was feeling sort of yucky when I got out of bed this morning. By 10:00, I was full fledged sick. Yep . . . the whole nine yards. I was driving the porcelain bus and had the dreaded "D" word. I also had chills and shakes and headache. I had fever off and on all day. However, tonight I have no fever, but my body feels like I've been run over by a truck. PLEASE tell me that this is not the flu! I had flu shot a couple of months ago. Isn't it terrible to wish that you food poisoning? If I wake up in the morning feeling the same, I am heading straight to the Dr. office. I hope that I can get some kind of shot or anti-biotics.

My race is next Sunday and I hope I can get my strength back. As far as training, I know that the hay is in the barn. There is nothing I can do to improve my race, I can only mess it up. I just need to calm down. I did run an easy 10 miler right before the game yesterday . . . that may be my last run before my half-marathon.

Friday, February 03, 2006

I played hookie today

I don't do it to often . . . but I played hookie from work. I had just sort of run out of gas on Thursday and decided that I had a lot of errands to run. More than I could do over several lunch hours. So the FAT MAN took a day of vacation. I actually slept in this morning. Of course for me, sleeping in means I get out of bed around 6:15 instead of 5:15. I can just hear all those office professionals and lawyers groaning out there. If you're not an early riser, you should try it. The mornings are the best part of the day-it's sort of like getting to start over. The air is fresher, there's less noise, little traffic. Besides, there's nothing like getting started early on your caffiene buzz!

Soooooooo . . . I ran my errands. One of which included shopping for a bike. I have a hybrid that is like a hundred years old with a steel frame and weighs 30 lbs. I mean a real bike. Several of you out there are triatheletes and duatheletes and you've inspired me. Several of my good friends bike. And I have lots of extra time on my hands. Thanks to Wayne K, Larry M, Kerry L, Dom S (one of my running compadres), Diane A, Cary W (my brother-in-law who lives in Portland and is an AVID cyclist), and many more that have been after me for a while to start biking seriously. Okay-I'm gonna give it a try. Haven't picked out a bike yet but I'm starting to narrow it down based on SIZE (does size really matter?), COMFORT, EASE OF MAINTENANCE/PARTS AVAILABILITY, and (drum roll, please) PRICE. My budget has increased as I've been shopping. I want to keep it around 2 grand. It seems that I can get a pretty decent composite or aluminum/composite frame with Shimano Ultegra components and decent saddle and wheels for this price. If you have any recommendations, please feel free to let me know.

I ran today. Did my hill work. It felt scary good. I warmed up with 2 1/2 miles at around an 8:15 pace and did 5 x 0.2 hill repeats and then finished with a 1 1/2 mile cool down. All said, about 6 miles.

Everybody needs to check out Amy's progress . . . She's scheduled to run a 10 miler this weekend. She is the the first link (30 YOF seeking marathon to run) on the right hand side. She has done a good job in quiting smoking and becomming a runner. I think she's been getting extra coaching from her beau. Be sure to stop by and congratulate her.

A taper long run (10 miles) Sunday. Have a GREAT WEEKEND!

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Psyche assignment

Okay. Now you've done it. Amy and Liv have sent out an assignment that on the surface seems pretty easy. But after thinking about it, it is pretty tough. How do you define your "ideal future"? Actually, Liv started it and Amy made it a "chain" assignment.

I am not sure if I have the wherewithall to define my "ideal future". Or my revised ideal future. As most of my readers and friends know, I have recently had a MAJOR freaking life change. I used to say that my ideal future was to grow old and be happy with Mona. Well that plan isn't going to happen. So now I have re-examine my life, my goals. That is a scary thought.

Like Amy, I am also a control freak. Not overbearing . . . just that I can't stand leaving something to chance. Now, my whole life is left up to chance. But I'll give it a try.

My "ideal future":
One thing I've learned over the 5 weeks is that I have become a lot more sensitive and compassionate. Where I used to just do the minimum to get by socially, I now appreciate people's pains and needs. Very much unlike the old Jim. Not that I was selfish . . . . I just didn't realize what other people may be feeling. I guess one aspect of my future life would be to become more serving to others and less self serving. I'm not going to run off to a third world country and live in a leper colony, but I will do more to help others.

Being an AR type person about my running, I have to mention goals in that arena of my life. You probably already know that I want to break 1:50 in the half-marathon and 4:00 in the marathon. I think that if I keep the fat man away and keep working, I can do it this year. Mercedes Marathon here in B'ham is next weekend and I really feel primed for my half-marathon goal. I am planning on two chance for my marathon goal this year. I'm doing the Flying Pig in Cincinnati in May and Portland Marathon on Oct 1 (my BIRTHDAY!). I don't think that I will ever qualify for Boston, unless I run as a 60 year old woman. But realistically, I'm not a natural runner . . . I have to work hard just to get a few seconds off my times. Maybe a 3:45 marathon is in my future. It depends on how hard I'm willing to work. Right now, it is hard to say if I can stay that motivated. I do want to start doing some duathlons. Maybe a good goal over the next year would be to do one.

Life itself. TOUGH to think about. With Mona only being gone a little over a month, it is hard to say what I want out of my life. I know that I don't want to disappear into the background. I don't want to become a hermit. I am not sure that I will ever find anyone as special as she was. Of course, I know I can't replace her and I would never try. But I ask myself if I want to be lonely the rest of my life. Too soon to delve into that area. For right now, I have no plans other than to live day to day. To do what Mona taught me-to take each day one day at a time and enjoy what I'm given. Anything else is gravy. I do want to remain a part of her family. She has two brothers, two sisters-in-law, one niece, and 4 nephews. I do want to remain "uncle Jim" for them.

I want to make many new friends, including my friends that I have met out here. I also want to reestablish old relationships. I want to let my existing friends now how important they are to me.

Sorry. I didn't want to make this a bummer trip. Right now, I am just living day by day. Every day is a gift and we should not take our days or friends for granted.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Picking up speed

Hey all! Today was a little bit better. The grief counseling that I am attending is helping. I still have a lot of work to do to get back to normal. However, as all the books I'm reading say, "normal will not be the way I was". Normal will be able to function day to day without any meltdowns. ENOUGH OF THAT, says the FAT MAN. I yell back, "it helps to talk about it!"

Thanks for the warning, Dom. I need to start running my longer runs (>15 avg=" 8:32/mile" avg=" 8:03/mile" avg=" 8:03/mile" avg=" 7:57/mile" avg=" 7:54/mile" avg=" 7:47/mile" href="http://www.firstgiving.com/jimhamlin">http://www.firstgiving.com/jimhamlin

Thank you Summer for the kind words.